"I wake up in the morning, I got to sleep at night, but a day without snack time? That just isn't right!"

Things I wish the lactation consultant had told me
about breastfeeding!


1. Watch out for flailing baby hands because if one of those flying fists of death happens to get a grip on your milky bits, it will bring tears to your eyes!

2. You need to "gather" before the baby latches on- make sure the remote, your phone, a drink, whatever you may need to keep yourself afloat as you feed your little one are by your side, because once the feed has begun you're in your seat for a bit! Unless your husband/SO is around, then you can boss them about to bring you this, that, and the other!

3. The more things you can do one-handed (eat, read, play Wii, etc...) the better!

4. Don't be insulted if your child is nursing and still prefers to stare at his father, even though you carried him for nine months, create food for him with your own body, have a road map of stretch marks across your thighs due to the rapid expanse of your body due to pregnancy, and, last but not least, has your boob in his mouth!!!

5. You might depend on your DVR'ed episodes of "Glee" to keep your sanity when your baby goes through that "feeding frenzy" phase and wants to nurse every. single. second.

6. Nursing might not be for everyone, but if you can do it, it's some of the sweetest, most intimate, most wonderful time you can spend with your baby!!

4 comments

Unknown said...

Thank you for this! I was cracking up while reading. Also they don't tell you if you fail to 'gather' you will be walking around hunched over nursing one handed trying to gather. Or better yet TRYING to explain to your toddler what it is you want! Ha.

Tat said...

Following you from the breastfeeding bloghop. Oh, the every.single.second bit sounds so familiar

Erin said...

What Morgan said! I have perfected this move. I can even climb over the baby gate aand get things from the kitchen if needed. Of course if I have the option I ask Yogi Dad...oh honey can you get me......he LOVES it! At least I'm pretty sure that's what he's saying with that little eyeroll. ;)

Taleah said...

Exactly! My husband thought it'd be funny to come make faces at my daughter while she was eating last night. Instead of staring at him, she decided to start giggling. I had to remind them both that it's rather messy if he does that :)