"There are many things that I would like to say to you, but I don't know how..."

I didn't anticipate how hard this past week was going to be. I had a very naive idea of what PJ's recovery would be like, and didn't anticipate the level of pain and discomfort he would be feeling. Seeing your child in pain is, on an emotional level, just exhausting. Pete and I were just discussing PJ's first night after his surgery, the way he was just screaming and writhing in pain, and we are just thankful that he is a baby and, most likely, has already forgotten that terrible night. Pete and I? We pretty much realize that as a parent, you don't even forget something like that, it leaves a scar on your heart. Seriously? My sister went through four open-heart surgeries before she was 6 years old, and I'm not sure how my parents made it through that without losing their minds!

So, we're worn out and still feeling emotional, but things are starting to look up! PJ had his urology follow up today! The stent was removed from the surgical site, and the doctor said that his Little Man Bits looked great and were healing beautifully! With the exception of the terrible diaper rash he has from the antibiotics and topical meds, PJ is healing and healthy! Except for a few seconds while the stent was removed, and a few minutes later when he tried out the pipes with his first stent-free pee (It stung. He cried. Loud. Poor muffin!) he was in a great mood today and was acting and moving about like his old self!

And the Mama breathed a sigh of relief.

Speaking of the Mama, I and finding myself in a position I have been in before- trying so hard to please people that it stresses me out and yet somehow managing to piss them off. The latter really isn't that much of a shock with my huge mouth, but it still makes me feel bad even when it shouldn't. I am just thankful that I have people in my life who understand me and know how to look past my gigantic gaping mouth flaws.

I know that was vague and made no sense. Sorry about that. I think that now would be a good time for me to retire to bed!

Oh, but not before I check on PJ for the billionth time! He's taken to sleeping on his belly and I am super paranoid about it!



Oh, wait. One more thing- just in case some of my new Twitter friends made it here, hi! My blog doesn't usually suck this bad! :-)

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